Thursday, February 11, 2010

Announcement !

I have been contacted by Jacques Rogge and asked if I would host the Winter Olympics. Olympic spy sattleites have determined that I have more snow on my lawn and pool than Vancouver. Jacques, or Jack as I call him, suggests that my pool would be good for that snowboarding tricky stuff and they want the ski jump where the plow put everything. The sidewalk can be a VERY short luge, luuge? I'm negotiating as we speak. I know I'm gonna demand that Katie Couric CANNOT show up. That blonde skier girl, Lindsay Vonn, who is on TV all the time and is currently hurt; she can't come either. Too much whining from her yesterday. She speaks only in superlatives, "excrutiatingly", "unbearable", etc. describing her shim injury. Suck it up honey. By March nobody will remember you if you don't win. Pea, I may need your Jeep to shuttle athletes. Don't worry I'll only put a few miles on it. New York Mayor Bloomberg said it costs $1,000,000 per inch to clear so maybe I'll just sell Jack the snow I have. That'll keep the meileage off Pea's wheels. Photos to follow.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Who is Rogge?

Anonymous said...

International Olympic Committee Chairman.