Einstein & Me

Watched a cable program on the Greatest Scientific Minds last night. They picked Galilleo (poor guy had no first name) Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawkings. Gallileo was tried, excommunicated and imprisoned for believing the Sun was the center of the solar system, Newton was a whack job who had zero social skills, Einstein was a party boy in college who couldn't get a job and Hawkings isn't dead yet so they're holding off saying nasty things about him I guess. All of them used mathematics to prove stuff about space. They worked on these math problems for years. Same friggin' problem for years! There were some of Fr. Gallagher's algerba I problems I could work on for light years and still wouldn't know where to start. Imagine if the world counted on us to solve these math problems!! I have trouble concentrating for 5 minutes on one thing let alone years. "Hmmm, black holes in space where do they go hmmmmm.....wonder where the chicken's fingers are?" That's more of my thought process. Then I thought this morning, "Does any of that stuff have an impact on me?" I'm never going to space. Could care less about black holes, relativity, solar systems, apples falling from trees etc. If that stuff was important why didn't they teach us that in grade school? If we ever had a grade school science class it was while I was out unloading penny pretzels or setting up chairs in the hall for Mr. Crosby and Frank. Frank was a lot like Galilleo, he had no last name either. I guess that's why girls were always smart, they never were sent out to unload pretzels. If there's a hell for Einstein and the boys it's probably spending eternity stuck in a classroom with guys like me who spend their time wondering deep thoughts like, "How many mini-marshmallows could I fit in my mouth?" How's that for a black hole?